Monday, June 24, 2013

Disabled Workers Are Being Paid Pennies Per Hour Legally and Finally People Are Starting to Get Outraged About It - News - Bubblews

Disabled Workers Are Being Paid Pennies Per Hour Legally and Finally People Are Starting to Get Outraged About It - News - Bubblews

My blog post on the fact that companies can and are paying disabled people sub-minimum wage, and how despicable it is.  I'm not happy, not one bit.

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Where Is the Love? The Case of Alex Spourdalakis

On Friday, June 7th, 2013, 14 year old Alex Spourdalakis was brutally murdered by his mother and godmother.

He was stabbed, twice in the chest, and two slits to the wrists.

Let that sink in for a minute.  How many of you, without any context whatsoever, just those two sentences, think this is a horrible event and those responsible should be punished to the fullest extent of the law?

Yeah.  Me too.

But throw the fact that he was autistic into it and suddenly the view changes.

Not for me.  But for a lot of others, this tips the scales.

Because of course it was so haaaaaaaaaaard for the MOTHER, don't you know?

The mother and godmother, who unsuccessfully attempted suicide, left a suicide note detailing how difficult it was caring for him.  And maybe it was.  We don't know the ins and outs of the situation.  But parenting, in itself, is hard.  It's always going to be hard.  You can't kill your kid because the game's too hard for you.  You don't have a choice in what kid you get.  You can't request an easier kid.  You get what you get - and you don't get upset.

A comment on one of the articles I saw said simply "she killed him out of love".  I'm sure Dorothy Spourdalakis loved her son very much and didn't want to see him in pain (Apparently Alex had gastrointestinal issues that he was hospitalized for repeatedly).  But ending another's life is not a choice to make lightly, and unless that person has specifically asked you to make those sorts of decisions, it's not your decision to make.

What if it was a nondisabled child?  A child who could have said "NO" when you were trying to kill him?  Does it make it any better that he couldn't form that word?  Because I bet if you couldn't speak, you'd still be screaming in your head, screaming for your own mother not to kill you.  Screaming for anyone not to kill you, actually, because that pesky survival instinct is pretty damn strong.

Alex had feelings, too.  I wonder what he felt as he was being murdered.  Hurt, maybe?  Betrayed?  Confused?  He was a human being too, with his own desires and feelings and ideas.  No matter how impaired someone is, it does not negate their humanity.

I don't care if you feel hopeless, helpless, what have you.  Murder is not an option.  Because you're taking someone's autonomy, choices, life away from them.  And disabled or not, that is not acceptable.

Alex had feelings, too.  I wonder what he felt as he was being murdered.  Hurt, maybe?  Betrayed?  Confused?  He was a human being too, with his own desires and feelings and ideas.  No matter how impaired someone is, it does not negate their humanity.

Alex Spourdalakis was a human being, flesh and blood, just as real as you or I.  I mourn for him, and for a life that shouldn't have ended.  I demand justice for him and all the other disabled victims who are killed by parents or caregivers in the name of mercy.  And I.  Will.  Not.  Give.  Up.

There will be a virtual vigil for Alex Sunday night into Monday.  Please join if you can.  https://www.facebook.com/events/387982241320567/387993201319471/?notif_t=plan_mall_activity

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Able passing privilege. Yes, it's a thing.

Full disclosure here, I spent about 10 years of my life being less visibly disabled (I refuse to say 'invisibly disabled".  All disabilities are visible to some extent to the right people in the right conditions.).  Around age 13 I began to use mobility aids, making myself "look" more disabled, and slowly continued down the path of visible disability until, at this point, I am the most visibly disabled I have ever been.  At the same time, my anxiety disorder is less visible, as are certain aspects of my CP, including a significant perceptual impairment that makes it difficult for me to tell directionality (I still struggle with telling left and right), and impairs my depth perception to a point where I literally will not see a step if it is the same color or pattern as the floor below or above it.  So yes, I know what it's like on both sides of the fence.  And I'm not saying that one is "better" than the other, or that both sides of the fence don't face major hurdles with regards to acceptance.  I'm just trying to illustrate that able passing privilege is, in fact, a thing.

As a less visibly disabled person, you can choose whether or not to disclose your disability.  There will (usually) be less judgment if people don't know that you, in fact, have a disability.  As a visibly disabled person, I have no choice, but to disclose, because the sheer fact that I walk in with crutches or roll in using my chair sends a big red flag of disability up.  Because of that, I am treated as less competent or patronized. I have no choice in the matter.  Before I meet new people, I am plagued with insecurities about how they will react when they see my mobility aids.  I wonder if those who are relatives or friends of my parents know I am crippled, if they have been told.  I wonder if a disabled person fits their mental image of what I look like, who I am.  I don't have the luxury of being able to choose whether or not to tell them, to be able to hide it.

As an invisibly disabled person, you can blend in, succumb to wonderful anonymity.  Every person on my college campus knows me, not by my name, but as "the girl with the scooter".  I constantly feel like there's a harsh, bright spotlight on my head that never, ever goes away.  Even on those days when all I want to do is curl into a ball and disappear, I can't.  Because people notice me, and I really, really wish they didn't.  And for the record, all the speed limit jokes get old.  Really old, like nasty-expired-food old.  Those oh-so-witty jokes are tossed my way whether I want them or not.

So, yes, you over there with the "invisible" learning disability, or other not as visible conditions, you have privilege.  It doesn't make you a bad person, just as having any other type of privilege (white privilege, class privilege, cis privilege, straight privilege, etc.) does not make you a bad person.  It's just something you have and need to acknowledge.  The fact of the matter is that I can't ever be a wolf in sheep's clothing.  I am simply, inexcusably, the wolf, claws and all.

Friday, May 10, 2013

Who has two crutches and is blogging for Teaching Tolerance??? THIS GIRL!!!

I am THRILLED to announce that I have been selected as a blogger for Teaching Tolerance!!!!  Teaching Tolerance is a magazine and blog that discusses diversity of all kinds in the classroom.  I grew up devouring issues of Teaching Tolerance magazine, so I'm humbled and ecstatic to be blogging for them.  Check out my first post here, an edited version of my post "Dignity of Loss", and keep a lookout for more posts in the future!

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Ironic (Or, How My Entire College Career Just Blew Up In My Face)

In hindsight, I know I should've seen this coming.

From day one, it was clear that the only way I would be welcome in your department was if I shoved all my limitations to the back.  Sat up straight and used my hands and tried to look as normal as possible for your convenience.  My disability would be tolerated so long as you could wax poetic about how much I "overcame".  My strong self-advocate skills would be praised - so long as they weren't directed toward you.  All the little things over the years....they should have been a warning beacon, a signal for me to get out now.

"Can you sit up, please?"

"I know you have motor skill issues, but you're going to have to be more careful."

"If you can't draw, how are you going to teach your students?"

All those words, all those implications, piled up like kindling, weighing on my back until you lit the match.  This whole semester was a teetering tower of Jenga blocks and you removed the block to make it all come tumbling down.

How dare you.  How dare you. How dare you accuse me of lying about my abilities and then try to sweet-talk your way into smoothing it over.  How dare you try to tell me about how words hurt when you're ripping me open with yours.  How dare you have a meeting about my "limitations" without even notifying me, let alone allowing me to attend.  How dare you tell me I'm making excuses.

If self-advocating is now called "belligerent", then hell yeah, I'm belligerent.  I have been burned time and time again, and expecting me to react kindly when you're telling me that my way of accommodating for myself is not valid is like poking a bear repeatedly with a stick and expecting it to not attack.  With a slash of your dagger-tipped words, you ripped open all the wounds that have been etched into my soul like poison tattoos and set them bleeding afresh. 

It's ironic, don't ya think.....on, oh, so many levels.  Because the reason I chose this major was because I didn't want any child to have to go through what I went through.  I thought that a department that taught about us would embrace my unique potential, and accept me for who I am.  But it turns out they teach about us, without us.  You can teach all the theory, all the rhetoric you want, but until you truly accept disabled people for who they are, all their little scars and beauty marks, you will never properly teach teachers how to teach those of us who learn differently.

What are you teaching the future teachers of America?  That disability is all or nothing?  That a disabled person can never be a teacher?  You are not teaching them acceptance - instead, you are teaching them hatred and ignorance.  I fear for their future students - bright eyed and bushy tailed and ready to learn.  But, oops, sorry, only kids who can do things in the typical way are allowed here, are allowed to learn.  My mistake.

You won.  You fucking won.  Because I am walking, limping, gimping away and I do not - do not - have spoons for your shit.  Is this what you want?  To drive people away from your department, one of the most respected education departments in the nation?  Because if you want that, congratulations, you succeeded.  Do you take pride in knowing that you broke me?

You may have won the battle, but you have not won the war.  Because I'm putting this out there, telling my story.  They deserve to know what happened.  They deserve to know what you did to me.  And maybe someday, some brave soul with far more spoons and far more fucks to give than I will take this higher.  Don't you see?  I let you off far easier than I should have.  I could have rang the alarm bells and got every disability advocate within the state of PA armed and ready to fire.  Don't think I didn't think about it.  But I'll get the last laugh, because someday when I'm kicking ass and empowering disabled kids in my own way, all around the world, maybe, just maybe, you'll think twice.  Maybe, just maybe, you'll regret what you did to me.  I hope, for the sake of all of us, that you will.

Blogging Against Disablism Day, May 1st 2013
Note:  This is my post for Blogging Against Disablism Day 2013.  It also serves as an explanation of sorts for why I haven't been blogging as of late.  Hop on over to Diary of A Goldfish and read all the excellent BADD posts which I am sure are much more coherent than mine is.